WANT & NEED

Sometimes what you want and what you need just don’t coexist. I’m the kind of girl if I want something I go after it; I do what ever it takes to get it. I work hard, for everything I have in my life. Weather it be material items, or friends and family. I’ve realized that the person I became in the past four years of my life is not the person I want to be. I became this materialistic, dreamer. Nothing in my life was constant. I was always looking for the next best thing. I’m tired of wanting, and buying for me. It’s obviously getting me nowhere. I have this big heart and need to help others, to give back. I’ve been blessed and I want to help share that feeling with others. The past four years, I’ve focused on feeling secure nothing else. I stopped living for me, and doing the things that makes me happy. The past few months, I’ve been taking the steps to get back to me. It’s been a rocky but amazing road so far. It’s only going to get better from here. “No risk, No reward.” It’s time I stop focusing on tomorrow and start living for today. I will let nothing and no one hold me back. If you asked me a year ago, what I wanted I wouldn’t be able to tell you anything except to get married. I was blinded by society telling me that was the next step to realize that wasn’t what I wanted at all. I look back on that now, as I make a list of the many things I want to experience and I smile. Knowing I am strong enough to overcome my fears gives me this overwhelming feeling of accomplishment. I’m, finally living.

BRITT

Timeline

I always thought those individuals who said "It's to early to tell", "we'll just have to wait and see" were living by this invisible timeline. Like everything had to happen at a specific time and a specific place. What I didn't realize is that it was me living by a timeline. I've always been a then and now person. Everything had to happen at that specific moment. Whether it be a small trivial thing or a life changing thing. I've always skipped the journey to find the treasure. The problem with skipping the journey to find the treasure is you miss the little treasures along the path; the knowledge. The most important things in life are the things we learn, and the things we share with others. I've always had an idea of the person I wanted to be. I want to be a helper, a giver, a lover. Someone people can rely. A good friend. I want to be a strong a loyal christian. I want to have a relationship with God that people can see immediately when talking to me. I want to travel and see the world. The first thing that has to go is my then and now attitude, the attitude that makes me want to know the answers now. I'm coming to realize that, I truly don't want the answer now. It's like instant gratification. Yes, it makes you happy in that moment but when it's over you've lost so much more than you've gained. If you slow down and enjoy your path, your journey if you will then you'd realize that there is so much more than just the answer out there. Each step, each bump in the road there is something to be learned, a lesson that later in life will get you through something that may feel impossible to get through. I know that God has this great plan for me, I just have to slow down and let him show me the way. Today, I will slow down - I will smell the roses and I will smile. I will smile at every new person I meet. I will show each person just a little bit of who I am in hopes that they will do the same. I will grow as a person, and I will learn. I will find the knowledge in every single thing I do. I will find the lesson, and I will teach it to someone who needs it. From now on, I'm walking my path slowly with eyes wide open. When it hurts, I'll rely on those who are closest to me. I'll open up to them, and express the way I feel. I'll no longer skip the hard stuff to get to the easy stuff. It's a new and beautiful day. So I will leave you with this; 

"You must be the change you wish to see in the world." -Mahatma Gandhi 

Out with the old, In with the new

I find it exhilarating redoing my entire apartment. It gives me a since of self worth. I’m more than ready to look around my apartment and see, me in everything I own. The days pass, and my smile remains. I can’t help but remind myself how fantastic life is. “You must be the change you wish to see in the world.” – Mahatma Gandhi. I will continue to remind myself of this as I travel my new journey. I will stop at nothing to live the life the good Lord so wishes for me to live. “I’ve never been this broken; I’ve got nothing left to give, so now I’m searching for salvation.” – Ron Pope. Growing up I always longed for this relationship with God but didn’t know where to find it. I now know; it’s not something you have to find. It’s something you have to live. It’s a choice you have to make. The choice is yours. I’m anxious to see where this road leads me, I can already tell it’s going to be an amazing and blessed ride. Here’s to new beginnings…